


Fixer Upper

by chocolatemoosey



Series: Space Shenanigans and Other Misunderstandings [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: (but no one knows he's galra yet not even keith), 19-year-old Keith, 21-year-old Shiro, Body Worship, Cunnilingus, Enthusiastic Consent, Established Relationship, Explicit Consent, Fake Marriage, Fluff, Forced Marriage (kind of), Galra Keith (Voltron), Hot Springs & Onsen, Humor, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Interrupted Blowjobs, Intersex Genitalia, Kissing, Lap Sex, M/M, Mild Dysphoria, Missionary Position, Misunderstandings, Non-Human Genitalia, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Sexual Content, Shenanigans, Sloppy Makeouts, Underage Drinking, Vaginal Fingering, Xeno, demisexual shiro, female-identifying genderfluid Pidge, hand holding, keith in a furisode, sex in the lion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-02
Updated: 2016-08-08
Packaged: 2018-07-28 20:45:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 17,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7656055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chocolatemoosey/pseuds/chocolatemoosey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After saving a planet from colonization, a cultural misunderstanding leads to Keith and Shiro becoming engaged. The couple is forced to comply when the reining monarch calls for their immediate marriage, lest they face a declaration of war upon the Voltron Alliance.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I absolutely fell in love with this series a few weeks ago, and the second that this idea popped into my head I immediately had to get it written down. Just a few things before we begin: in this fanfiction Shiro is twenty-one, Keith is nineteen, Hunk and Lance are eighteen, and Pidge is fifteen (almost sixteen); so everyone involved in sexytimes is the age of consent. The trigger warnings for this chapter are mentions of gender dysphoria, implied/referenced rape and sexual slavery, and a vibrant description of a panic attack.
> 
> Also, I use 'she/her' pronouns for Pidge, since she has verbally identified as a girl in series. However, I personally headcanon her as female-identifying genderfluid, as I mentioned in the tags. As for Keith, I headcanon him as Galra, as per the fan theories, and thus he has xenobiological genitalia. But since he isn't aware of this, he identifies as intersex. I hope to be as respectful as possible to these two situations, and if anything I've written comes across as offensive, please let me know.
> 
> I should also mention that if there are any glaring similarities between my Voltron works and Cheshirecity's works, it is because we have shared headcanons due to being girlfriends in real life. 
> 
> And yes, the title is from Frozen.

                The Black Lion touched down on the grassy knoll, the carpet of flowers flowing out around its paws like little ripples. The machine worked its jaw as it crouched down to place its head upon its feet. While Shiro dismounted, the other four Lions and their paladins joined their leader on the ground.

                Cresting the hill was Princess Allura, white hair tumbling down out of its twist as she ran to meet her charges. Although breathless, she was smiling; Allura was completely aglow at a job well done.

                The paladins had just managed to take down a small Galra fleet. The invaders had been attempting to begin the colonization of the planet Apis, a small ringed planet routinely used by the galaxy as a luxury vacation spot. Thankfully, Team Voltron had landed there for supplies just as Apis’ queen had been faced with the ultimatum of surrender or war.

                Behind Allura was Coran, sputtering happy salutations and congratulations, as well as the planet’s monarch and her attendants. Queen Florea stood at a formidable seven feet tall, her long insect limbs flanked with fine tufts of yellow and black hair. As she positioned herself before the paladins, her attendants scattered around her and immediately began to preen at her hair and gown.

                Shiro took his place before her, the other paladins quickly joining his side. Spotting one of the tiny attendants, Lance dragged a hand through his sweat-tangled hair and flashed his most charming smile.

                “Hi,” he husked, firing a finger gun at the demurely dressed alien. She stared at him for a solid five seconds – round black eyes unimpressed and blasé – before returning to her preening. Keith nailed Lance in the side with an elbow.

                “Um, _ow_!” Lance sniped in return, but Keith was facing towards the queen. Shiro shot a glance back at the blue paladin and returned his attention towards Florea.

                The queen assessed the paladins in turn before folding herself down to Shiro’s height. Hunk started towards him with a concerned noise, but Shiro remained calm, allowing the queen to nuzzle at his hair, leaving behind a fine sheet of yellow dust. Pidge sneezed.

                “Kind Paladins of Voltron,” Florea addressed them, turning towards Keith to offer her embrace. Keith flinched backwards, only settling when Allura shot a murderous glance at him over the queen’s shoulder. After dusting him as well, the queen nuzzled up against Hunk, Lance, and offered a kind pat on the head for a still sniffling Pidge. “Many thanks are in order for the kindness you have bestowed upon my people.”

                “It is a duty and an honor, your majesty,” Shiro responded with all the grace of a trained diplomat. Behind the queen, Allura was glowing with pride.

                “I cannot begin to repay you for what you have done,” Florea said, rising to her full height. “But perhaps I can offer our hospitality for an evening? You see, the Galra were attempting to colonize our planet due to the medicinal purposes of our natural springs. Many come from across the far reaches of the galaxy to take the waters, but few are blessed with the opportunity. I would like for you all to bathe in the waters of Apis. Perhaps the god Mallophora will allow this and bring great blessings to the land.”

                Behind her, at least three attendants rolled their eyes.

                Shooting a quick glance at Allura and receiving an affirmative, Shiro addressed the queen: “Your majesty, we would be honored.”

                “Then it is settled!” Allura clapped her hands together as the queen turned towards her. “Tonight Apis becomes the newest member of the Voltron Alliance.”

                The attendants cried out happily alongside Coran, Pidge, and Hunk while Shiro smiled in silent celebration. Meanwhile, Keith was pretending not to care and Lance was still ogling the attendant, both actions surprising absolutely no one.

                “Cypria,” Queen Florea addressed the disgruntled maidservant, “Please show our guests to the Springs of Mel Mellis.”

                A look of absolute loathing crossed Cypria’s face for a split second before she schooled it into an expression of subservience.

                “Yes my Queen,” she responded before turning to another handmaiden. “Dorsata, help me attend to the paladins.”

                The antennae of the younger attendant shot straight up, “O-of course!” she squeaked.

                Cypria and Dorsata approached the envoy, both bowing their heads low.

                “Right this way,” Cypria said, gesturing down the hill and towards a copse of trees that surrounded the Apisian township.

                “Thank you, but I think I would like to continue talks with the Queen before I bathe,” Allura said politely. “Coran, you should join the others.”

                “It’ll be just like my good old cadet days!” Coran declared, slapping Lance on the shoulder. “I can teach you all the best Altean washing songs – OOOOH I WISH AND I WASH AND I SCRUB REAL GOOD—!”

                “ _Kill me_ ,” Pidge mouthed towards Hunk as they started off towards the springs. The yellow paladin smothered a snort into his palm as they descended the knoll.

                “Sooo,” Lance started up over Coran’s enthusiastic bellowing. He immediately sidled up to Cypria, whose eye twitched. “What’s up with you guys? Are you supposed to be bees or something?”

                “I don’t know what you’re implying by that, but you shouldn’t push your luck when it comes to me,” Cypria snapped, “I’m not only an attendant to the queen, but also her personal bodyguard. So unless you want to lose whatever primitive alien junk you’re toting in those tight little pants of yours, _back off_.”

                The entirety of the group froze, staring at the handmaiden. Dorsata produced a high, keening noise of distress in the back of her throat.

                “Hohohohooooly shit,” Pidge laughed, staring up at Lance, whose face was doing its best impression of a sheet. “You got _told_.”

                Ever the peacemaker, Shiro cleared his throat, “Lance, knock it off. I’m sorry for the trouble, miss.”

                “It’s whatever,” shrugged Cypria, urging them into the wood. A mischievous look crossed her face as she fell back to walk in step with Pidge, “But you know, as far as that bee analogy goes: I _am_ a worker bee, so I’m a bit more taken with the fairer sex.”

                Pidge’s grin brightened and she cackled gloatingly at Lance.

                “Oh my _God_ ,” Lance balked, turning towards Keith, who—again—was trying to look like he didn’t care about the Team Voltron Traveling Shitshow unfolding around him. “Pidge can’t do that – tell her she can’t _do_ that!”

                “Why would she listen to me?” Keith inquired, hands habitually seeking his pockets and sliding over the slick surface of his armor. He settled for crossing them over his chest.

                “Because – you’re – she – _Shiro!_ ” Lance shrieked, pointing accusatorily towards Pidge. Shiro kept his gaze straight and level, looking like he was about to cup one hand around his eyes and stare at the ground.

                “He’s _right there_ Lance, you don’t have to tattle on me to him,” Pidge rolled her eyes, sliding an arm around Cypria, who was attempting to hold back laughter. “Besides, I’m a big girl. I can handle myself.”

                “You’re like twelve!”

                “I’m almost sixteen!”

                “That’s even worse!”

                “You know, on Altea the marriage age _was_ the equivalent of sixteen human years, if I’m not mistaken,” Coran piped in, stroking his moustache methodically.

                “Who said anything about getting married?” Hunk spoke up, suddenly very alert to the situation. “Pidge can’t get married, she’s a _baby!_ ”

                “A sixteen-year-old baby?!” Pidge finally pulled away from a very-amused Cypria. The brunette planted her hands on her hips.

                “You haven’t even learned the ways of the world yet,” Lance stated sagely.

                Shiro gave in, finally pressing his hand up to the side of his eyes, staring at the forest floor in manic embarrassment.

                ‘ _This is my team,_ ’ he thought. ‘ _These are also my_ children _, apparently. Where did I go wrong?_ ’

                Pidge was scowling, “If you’re talking about girlfriends, trust me I have plenty of exp—.”

                “O-KAY,” Shiro said loudly, interrupting whatever insanity was unfolding around him. “It looks like we’re at the springs, how about everyone gets ready to clean off. Not you Pidge.”

                Pidge, who was already standing at the mouth of the hot spring and stripping off her armor, stared at the men standing around her.

                “Oh yeah,” she said slowly. “I forgot that gender is a thing that exists.”

                “W-we’d be happy to take the Green Paladin to another more secluded spring,” Dorsata spoke up after having been spending the majority of the walk in mortified silence.

                “Thank you,” Shiro sighed in relief. Suddenly, he noticed Keith beside him, giving him a very insistent side-eye. “Actually… do you think we might be able to spread out? I think some of us want to soak for a while.”

                “Certainly,” said Dorsata, gesturing further into the forest. “If you want some peace and quiet, you can find some very secluded springs further down the path. If you’ll excuse us, we’ll see the Green Paladin off and return with some bathing supplies.”

                “Thank you, but that won’t be necessary. I need some time to think,” Shiro said, returning the little wave of sendoff the two attendants sent his way.

                Once the girls had departed, Lance immediately began to throw his armor to the ground, looking like he hadn’t had a proper bath in a year.

                “I’m gonna get so clean you guys,” he was saying, easing into the water.

                Shiro bumped Keith’s hip with the back of his hand. “Come on,” he said softly, and the two started off in the direction Dorsata had indicated. Behind them it appeared that shenanigans were already in full swing.

                “Alright gents!” Coran was cheering at Lance and Hunk. “Get ready to scrub! From the top: OOOH RUB-A-DUB-DUB IN THE TUBBY-TUB-TUB.”

                Shiro shook his head, running a hand through his hair as he laughed softly, “Boy do I feel bad for them.”

                Keith cocked an eyebrow as they moved deeper into the copse of trees, “Do you really?”

                Shiro smiled, this time lightly touching the back of Keith’s hand with his, “Maybe only a little.”

                The red paladin’s lip curled into a rare little smile as he surrendered the cup of his hand to Shiro’s. Fingers laced, they pressed on.

                Now that they had a moment to appreciate the scenery outside of battle, Keith silently admitted to himself that the view was – charming. “Aesthetic”, Lance would call it. Even in the height of the day, the sky was a dusty shade of rose gold, the red and blue suns casting strange shadows and double-halos around the forest. Small, fragrant-smelling plants lined the forest floor, their flowers delicate shades of puce. Thin, white-trunked trees jutted up into the sky, their leaves deep shades of purple and teal.

                He refused to let the word “romantic” cross his mind.

                “You know,” Shiro started, breaking Keith out of his contemplative reverie. “This is a little… romantic, isn’t it?”

                Well, there went Keith’s attempt at avoiding sappiness. He should’ve known better. If he was alone with Shiro for more than two minutes, things were bound to get real schmoopy real fast.

                “I don’t know,” Keith responded for lack of a better answer. He was too focused on making sure he didn’t blush. Instead, he anxiously began to rub at Shiro’s thumb, staring in the opposite direction.

                Shiro slowed down, turning his hand in Keith’s so that they could face one another. “Are you okay? You seemed a little anxious on the way out here.”

                Fuck Shiro and his attentiveness to Keith’s body language. The red paladin scowled hard at the ground, but Shiro leaned forward to press a kiss to his temple. Keith melted immediately. There was absolutely no way to get irritated at Shiro, especially when they were holding hands.

                “Yeah well,” Keith hedged grumpily. “I wasn’t exactly keen on letting anyone _see_ me.”

                Shiro nodded in understanding, “That’s why I asked if we could have privacy.”

                “Oh really?” Keith quipped, his grin taking on a wicked edge. “I thought you just wanted to get me alone?”

                Shiro coughed into his empty fist, his face turning bright red. “That. Uh,” he mumbled. “I mean, I won’t tell you that didn’t cross my mind…”

                ‘ _You’re too honest for your own damn good_ ,’ Keith thought, closing the distance between them. He rolled up onto his toes, pecking Shiro’s lips quickly before taking the lead once more.

                “You’re cute,” Keith told his boyfriend, still grinning.

                “Wh—wait what? Why?” Shiro asked, looking completely perplexed.

                Keith didn’t reply, but instead turned a corner down the path. A little stone staircase was built into the side of a slope leading to a comfortably-sized hot spring. The side nearest to the path was mostly obscured by a conveniently-placed flowering tree. A few of the soft blue petals had begun to fall into the water, giving it a sweet scent.

                “Here, you wanted romantic, right?” Keith deadpanned, dragging Shiro down the staircase. The black paladin laughed, sheepishly scratching at the back of his neck.

                “And you wanted private, so I think this should be perfect,” he concluded, stripping off the rerebraces and vambraces of his armor and setting them neatly aside. He turned to Keith, who was sitting on the ground and struggling out of his sabaton. Shiro grabbed ahold of the shoe and gently tugged it from Keith’s foot before helping him with the other.

                “Jesus,” Keith said, shrugging out of his cuirass and rubbing at the jointure of his shoulder, “I know this armor is supposed to be light-weight but it still hurts my fucking neck.”

                Shiro reached over and gave the crook of Keith’s neck a squeeze. The red paladin surrendered to his touch immediately, groaning in appreciation. Shiro laughed and began to remove his own cuiche and greave.

                “No, keep doing that,” Keith demanded weakly, kicking off his leg armor as well.

                “Be patient,” the other laughed softly, setting aside the remainder of his armor. He grasped at the zip of his bodysuit before his fingers faltered – Keith hadn’t seen him naked since before he’d been held captive. He hadn’t seen the scars. Every ugly inch pockmarked with the faded remains of sucker bruises and cattle prod welts – the gnarled remains of skin on his back from lashes and—

                Shiro’s vision was tunneling. He felt like someone had poured a cup of icy-cold water down his throat and it was seeping into his body, forcing him out. The noise of the wind and the distant fauna slowed and warped, as if Shiro was hearing it through a glass case. His chest was burning, eyes darting around as he tracked an escape route that his lead limbs couldn’t take.

                Suddenly, sturdy hands clapped down over his shoulders and Shiro reared back in fear, pushing away and turning to brace his hand on a tree. Someone was talking to him, voice awful and garbled. Hesitant fingers fluttered just out of his line of sight.

                “—safe. Hold – breath, Shiro—.”

                Shiro responded immediately to the suggestion, taking a gasping breath and holding it. His heart was slamming its way up into his throat, lungs constricting unpleasantly. He hadn’t even noticed he’d been hyperventilating. He let the breath out on a rush of trembling air, each following breath coming slower and slower.

                “Can I touch you?” Keith asked, his voice regaining clarity in Shiro’s ears.

                “Wh—yeah,” Shiro nodded emphatically. “Yeah that—okay.”

                Keith pressed a tentative hand to the center of Shiro’s back and began to rub it in little circles.

                “You’re okay,” he said, voice unwavering and soft. “You’re safe. I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”

                Shiro nodded again, taking in a breath through his nose and letting it out in a long hiss. He repeated this several times before he sank down to his knees and rolled to prop himself up against the tree.

                “What happened?” Keith asked hesitatingly. “Were you having an asthma attack?

                “I think—,” Shiro said, licking his lips. “I think I just had a panic attack?”

                “A panic attack?” Keith said dubiously. “It looked like you were dying, not anxious.”

                Shiro shook his head, “Katie’s brother Matt used to have them all the time.” The memories blossomed in his head like dye diffusing in water: Matt curled in two, his head pressed to the floor while he shrieked out a sob with every breath. “The first time I saw it happen, I thought he was having a mental breakdown.”

                “No wonder,” Keith said softly, patting Shiro’s arm. “I’m – I’m sorry I grabbed you without asking. I didn’t know—.”

                Shiro held up a hand in forgiveness, pressing the other to his chest. “It’s okay. Like you said,” he heaved in a breath. “You didn’t know.”

                Keith was silent, his grip on Shiro’s arm tightening a fraction. “Do you want to go back to the ship? You might feel better if you get into the healing pod for a while.”

                The suggestion crawled over Shiro’s back like a bug. “No, I think the last thing I need is to be crammed up in one of those.”

                “Okay,” Keith agreed. He looked down at the spring. “What do you want to do?”

                “I just – I think I just need a minute to breathe,” Shiro resolved. “Go ahead and get in the water. I’ll catch up with you in a few minutes.”

                “Okay,” Keith repeated after a pause. He narrowed his eyes, “Are you sure?”

                Shiro waved him towards the spring, “Go get clean.”

                Keith took another moment to consider Shiro before looking up at the stone stairs. After quickly surveying their surroundings, he removed the last of his armor and pulled down the zip on his bodysuit. He cast an uncharacteristically shy look at Shiro – who managed his calmest smile – and pulled off the rest of his clothes.

                It was certainly a welcome sight – Keith was all sinew and lean muscle with long limbs and narrow hips. His nipples were already pebbled from the exposure to the cool air around them. Shiro’s gaze lingered lower and Keith turned away from him in embarrassment.

                From first glance, he didn’t look different from a regular human male save for a slight violet discoloration on his cockhead. But the soft pair of lips and sensitive nerves behind it were a great source of anxiety and embarrassment for the red paladin. Before Shiro had left for Kerberos, he’d asked Keith if he wanted to talk about going all the way.

                There had certainly been a myriad of times when they’d ground one another to completion, and Keith seemed more than willing to provide hand jobs and oral sex – but whenever Shiro had asked if Keith needed something in return, he’d been met with a quick refusal. Even though Keith had inevitably had orgasms with him before, Shiro just assumed he was somewhere on the ace spectrum and never had pushed it. Keith had finally explained his situation several weeks before Shiro was expected to leave on the expedition.

                 “I can’t have sex with you,” he’d said to Shiro one night when they were walking through the football field behind the academy. His arms were crossed firmly over his chest, something Shiro had quickly learned was a sign of anxiety in his partner.

                “That’s okay,” Shiro responded, touching Keith’s shoulder softly. “I never want you to do anything that you don’t want to do – we don’t need to have sex to have a fulfilling relationship.”

                Keith pulled away sharply, pausing somewhere near the forty-yard line. Shiro faltered, reaching out tentatively.

                “I’m sorry—,” he began, but was quickly cut off by Keith.

                “No Shiro, you didn’t say anything wrong— _fuck_ ,” he swore, dragging his hands through his hair. “You’re too goddamn perfect, you know?”

                “No?” Shiro responded, looking and feeling absolutely lost. “No, I don’t think so – Keith, what’s the matter? Please talk to me.”

                “I _want_ to have sex with you,” he mumbled, face bright red even though it was only visible in the distant lights from the academy. Shiro’s heart lifted, hot-cold sensations trailing over his shoulders and into his chest. “But – I _can’t,_ Shiro.”

                “Could you explain why?” Shiro asked gently. “Maybe there’s something we could do? There’s a lot of ways to—.”

                “No, it isn’t because – _argh_!” Keith turned away from Shiro, shielding his body with his arms once more. “I mean we _could_ but I _can’t_.”

                “Babe I’m _really_ confused right now,” Shiro admitted. “Are you sure I didn’t do something wrong—?”

                “I’m both,” Keith mumbled.

                “What?” Shiro asked, not having heard properly due to his boyfriend’s low tone.

                “I’m both! I have _both_!” Keith hissed at Shiro, looking incredibly pained. Shiro blinked, mildly surprised.

                “You’re intersex?”

                “I don’t _know_ ,” Keith responded. “My mom died before I realized I was – _weird_.”

                “Keith, you’re not weird,” Shiro soothed, approaching his boyfriend and gently cupping his cheek. “There’s nothing wrong with you.”

                “My junk’s all fucked up; even the Garrison doctor doesn’t know what to think of it,” Keith pressed his forehead into Shiro’s shoulder, allowing the other to lay a gentle kiss against his hair. “I was just – I didn’t think you’d want me anymore.”

                “Not want you?” Shiro pulled away, gently clasping Keith by the shoulders. “Of course I want you, Keith. I love you.”

                “Shiro!” Keith turned so red that his cheeks began to look a sickly purple. “You don’t need to—.”

                “It’s how I feel,” Shiro slid his hands down Keith’s arms and joined their hands together. “I love you, Keith. I want to do anything I can to make sure you feel respected and comfortable.”

                “But aren’t you into guys?” Keith asked in a mumble, directing his gaze towards the Astroturf.

                “Keith, I’m into _you_ ,” Shiro smiled, ducking down to catch Keith’s eyes. “I don’t think I’ve ever even been _attracted_ to anyone before I met you.”

                “Bull,” said Keith good-naturedly. Shiro laughed and gently bumped their noses together.

                “It’s not, I’m being sincere. You’re the only person I’ve ever wanted, no matter what,” Shiro said before he brushed their lips together. Keith wrapped his hands around Shiro’s waist, pulling him flush against his body. Several minutes of passionate making out later, Keith finally pulled away.

                “We’re going to need to get condoms right now.”

                Shiro snorted to himself at the memory. Keith, who was currently scrubbing sweat out of his hair, blinked over at Shiro.

                “What’re you laughing at?” he inquired suspiciously.

                “Just remembering how romantic you are,” Shiro responded.

                “Harr harr. _You’re_ the romantic one, you big sap,” Keith accused, splashing a little water at his boyfriend. Shiro laughed again and began to remove his bodysuit – if Keith could feel comfortable enough in front of him, then he could feel comfortable enough in front of Keith.

                The red paladin watched surreptitiously over one shoulder as Shiro stripped down and eased into the spring, groaning as the water immediately began to work the tension out of his muscles. Shiro dipped his head under the water, surfacing to smooth a hand through his sopping wet hair.

                “Oh this feels _great_ ,” Shiro said, wading over to Keith. “I should’ve gotten in earlier.”

                “You were dying,” Keith responded flatly. Shiro laughed and splashed Keith, who scowled and slapped a handful of water at his boyfriend.

                “Come here,” Shiro requested, extending an arm. Anxiously he watched as Keith’s eyes trailed over his exposed body, holding none of their usual lustiness but instead clouding over with concern. He approached tentatively, reaching out to run wet fingers down Shiro’s chest, tracing a long, thick scar where a claw had ripped the skin.

                Shiro opened his mouth to reply, but only released a groan as Keith ducked down and pressed a wet, open-mouthed kiss to it. One hand still pressed to Shiro’s chest and the other tracing the scars on his bicep, Keith turned to run his lips along the band of discolored skin on Shiro’s arm that led down into the prosthetic. He nuzzled into the circuitry, the gentle touch absolutely breaking Shiro’s heart. Then, Keith dropped to his knees and ran a hot tongue across Shiro’s hip, his eyes clouded over with licentious intent—

                A high-pitched gasp broke the tension immediately and Keith flung himself as far away from Shiro’s dick as he physically could in the small spring. Shiro immediately flew into panic mode, spotting the trembling form of the handmaiden standing upon the stone stairs. Dorsata had dropped the bucket and washing implements within, and they were spilling down the steps.

                ‘ _Oh_ shit,’ Shiro thought, raising up his hands and waving them purposefully. ‘ _I thought I told her not to bug us?_ ’

                “Uh. Everything’s okay, Miss. Nothing to worry about, just—normal human stuff going on here—.”

                “Oh my fucking God,” Keith said from where he was crouched in the corner of the pool, attempting to shield himself as best as possible. “ _Just leave_!” he barked over his shoulder.

                The maid made a strange buzzing noise and the tiny wings on her back began to beat quickly – she lifted up several feet from the ground and took off as quickly as she had appeared. Keith relaxed, but was still glaring at the spot where she’d been standing seconds earlier. Shiro dropped his face into his hands with a defeated groan.

                “I hope we didn’t offend her,” he grumbled before turning to Keith. “We should go get dressed and try to diffuse the situation.”

                “Hopefully there isn’t one,” Keith grumbled, passing Shiro and climbing out of the hot spring. He grabbed a fluffy towel that Dorsata had dropped and began to rub it over his hair. Shiro grabbed his own towel and followed Keith’s actions. His heart was pounding from embarrassment and anxiety. He didn’t want to have dissolved the most recent alliance just from the equivalent of fooling around with his boyfriend in a hot tub. Moreover, he didn’t want to face Allura’s wrath.

                At the very least, the pollen was out of his hair.

                The two scrambled back into their armor as quickly as possible before picking up the dropped bathing supplies and heading into town. As they approached the other springs, it appeared that Lance, Hunk, and Coran had finished up, which was a relief. Shiro _really_ didn’t want to do the walk of shame in front of Coran, and Keith would _never_ hear the end of it from Lance.

                “Maybe she didn’t say anything?” Keith suggested as they made their way through the copse and into the town proper.

                As Shiro expected, Allura was standing at the flower-decked trellis that acted as the gateway into the town of Propolis.

                “ _There_ you are!” she cried upon spotting them. She marched over to the sheepish paladins, concern marring her features. “What on Altea _happened_? That poor little maid buzzed into the town shouting about the Black and Red Paladins and now everyone is all aflutter!”

                “I think there might have been a misunderstanding,” Shiro started, only to be interrupted by a particularly loud buzzing. Approaching from above was Queen Florea and her entourage. She landed in front of Shiro, fell to her knees, and promptly wrapped him in an enthusiastic embrace.

                “Oh happy day!” she said, nuzzling him affectionately before reaching out one of her bizarrely long arms and gathering Keith into her embrace as well, peppering his cheeks in little kisses with her antennae. Keith reared back and struggled in her embrace like a cat attempting to escape being picked up. “Such a joyous occasion on my fair planet! First the foiling of an invasion, and now good tidings such as these! Surly Mallophora smiles upon my kingdom this day!”

                “Keith! Shiro!”

                “Oh _fuck me_ ,” Keith groaned as Hunk, Pidge, Lance, and Coran approached at a run. His eyes then clouded in confusion as he spotted the little flower crowns decking their heads. Cypria was attempting to pin a metal on the coat what appeared to be a green riding habit that Pidge was wearing.

                “What the heck’s going on?” Hunk asked. “That little bee-fairy flew into town and now everyone is getting dressed up? Including us?” He gestured towards the crown of what appeared to be hibiscus encircling his head. “I mean, not that I’m complaining. This thing looks great.”

                “Princess?” Coran asked, looking to Allura, who was just as bewildered.

                “Oh!” the queen laughed merrily, accepting two flower crowns from one of her attendants and promptly plopping them down onto Shiro and Keith’s heads. “Yes, yes, I _knew_ the nepeta flowers would look perfect with that monochrome hair!”

                “Your majesty,” Shiro began. “Uh. _Thank_ you for all your hospitality but – what’s going on?”

                The queen’s face instantly went blank and she stared from Shiro to Keith and back.

                “Why,” she said. “We’re simply celebrating your engagement?”

                “Engagement?!” several people shouted at once.

                “Whoa, whoa, whoa, WHAT?” Lance yelled. “You’re getting _married_?!”

                Keith was saying nothing, but was staring at the ground as if he were attempting to bore a hole into it with his sight alone.

                Hunk immediately burst into tears.

                “We are _NOT_ engaged!” Shiro shouted, immediately turning towards Allura for help. Upon seeing the princess’ startled expression, he turned back to Queen Florea. “There’s been a HUGE misunderstanding!”

                The queen looked taken aback. “A misunderstanding? Dorsata said she saw you two making love in the spring of lovers.”

                Keith released a high-pitched noise. Shiro just made a choked “Ah” sound.

                “You did WHAT?!” Allura shouted, hands twitching violently.

                “OH MY GOD, YOU GUYS SERIOUSLY DID THE NASTY IN PUBLIC?” Lance yelled, pointing at the pair accusatorily.

                “Ah, young love,” Coran laughed, stroking his moustache in what could only be described in the manner of an amused uncle.

                Keith just put his face in his hands. Shiro looked like he wanted to crawl into a hole and die of shame. The only thing processing in his brain was the word “welp” on repeat.

                “Nice,” Pidge snickered.

                “OH MY GOD, YOU GUYS,” Hunk said through heaving sobs, toddling towards the couple and grabbing them both in a big bear hug. “I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW YOU WERE DATING. OH MY GOD, I’M SO HAPPY FOR YOU BOTH. THIS IS SO BEAUTIFUL.”

                “…you seriously didn’t know?” Pidge mumbled, cocking one eyebrow.

                “Your majesty, this really is a _huge_ mistake,” Allura turned towards the queen, attempting to diffuse the situation as quickly as possible. “While my paladins may be uh – _involved_ – I doubt that they were attempting to erm—.”

                “In Apisean culture if even but a kiss is exchanged in the Spring of Two Lovers, the couple must be wed _immediately_!” the queen insisted, the double set of wings behind her fluttering anxiously.

                “MARRIED?” Keith finally choked out, removing his face from his hands.

                “YOU’RE GETTING MARRIED?” Hunk sobbed anew, wiping his face with the back of his hand. “OH MY GOD, I ALWAYS CRY AT WEDDINGS. I’M SO SORRY YOU GUYS, I’M JUST SO HAPPY FOR YOU—.”

                “We are _not_ getting married!” Shiro spoke up suddenly, raising his hands in an attempt to appease the queen. “Your majesty, we are _so_ flattered by your kindness, but I _really_ have to insist we leave—.”

                “ _Leave!”_ the queen cried hysterically. “No! _No!_ I absolutely forbid it! You cannot leave until you are properly wed! Oooh, Mallophora will rain down terror upon my people, the tea crops will wither and die, the beauty will drain from my face.”

                The queen’s attendants were glaring at Shiro as if to say “thanks a lot”.

                The queen wailed on, “If you do not accept this and wed immediately, then consider the planet Apis your enemies! I shall declare war upon the Castle of Lions!”

                “War!” Allura started, looking terrified. “Queen Florea, we mean absolutely no insult to you or your people! The Voltron Alliance is committed to spreading peace and harmony throughout the galaxy!”

                “Perhaps we could take a rain check?” Coran piped in helpfully.

                The queen inhaled a massive sniffle and began to sob loudly, “War! WarwarwarwarwarwarWAR!”

                Cypria immediately approached Shiro and Keith, taking each by the hand and taking them to the side of the conflict. The queen continued to wail while her attendants and the rest of Team Voltron attempted to soothe her. Cypria grabbed them by the material of their bodysuits between their belts and breastplates and yanked them down to her height.

                “ _Look,”_ she hissed. “We may be nothing more than a resort planet, but if you haven’t noticed: _our queen is crazy_. She will absolutely attempt war on you with what little resources we have, and that’ll be the end of our planet. We can’t stand up to that giant you have on your side, _trust me_. I am literally the most competent bee here.”

                “So what should we do?” Shiro asked in a low voice.

                “ _Play along_ ,” Cypria growled, glaring at him. “You won’t actually be married. Just let her have her little pomp and circumstance, and you can be on your way in morning.”

                “Okay,” Shiro sighed, pinching his nose between his thumb and forefinger. “What do we have to do?”

                “You’re not actually thinking of going along with this?!” Keith hissed at Shiro, his eyes fixed in a glare. Shiro looked at him apologetically.

                “Let’s just see what we can work out,” he replied, and then returned his attention to Cypria. “Well?”

                “You have to strip down and mate before the Queen and her vassals,” Cypria said, as if she was describing the weather.

                “NO,” said Keith very loudly, drawing attention from all those around them. The queen’s sobs intensified.

                “Get _down_ here you idiot,” Cypria dragged him back down to her height. “Well? Do you have any other ideas? Your alien wedding ceremonies can’t be any tamer.”

                “Tame. Right,” Keith said.

                “Wait,” said Shiro. “That just gave me an idea.”

                “Well, spit it out!”

                Meanwhile, the queen was still in histrionics. Allura was reaching up and patting her shoulder comfortingly.

                “Please don’t be upset, your majesty!” she insisted. “Is there not _any_ other way we could go about this? The paladins are still quite young—.”

                “Love,” huffed the queen between her tears dramatically. “Knows _no_ age!”

                “Uh,” said Allura.

                “Your majesty!” Cypria called out. The queen turned towards her, wiping away the honey that was leaking from her eyes.

                “What?” she demanded breathlessly.

                “The paladins have agreed to marry!” Cypria reported with all the false enthusiasm she could muster.

                “WHAT?!” Allura and Lance shouted, both looking absolutely taken aback. Hunk started to cry again and Coran nodded in approval.

                “Neat!” said Pidge, flashing a thumbs-up.

                “Shiro, Keith, you really don’t—,” Allura said nervously, approaching her paladins with hands raised in hesitation.

                “It’s okay,” Shiro said to her, managing a small smile. Meanwhile, Cypria had approached the queen.

                “You see, the paladins _really_ wanted to be able to engage in the traditional marriage ceremony of their home planet,” Cypria informed Florea. “As a way to share their customs with us – to solidify the alliance.”

                The queen’s misery immediately evaporated, black eyes asparkle with tears of joy, “Is this true?”

                “Yes, your majesty, it’s true. We wanted to be able to have a proper exchange of customs,” Shiro explained, wrapping an arm around Keith who was faking a smile so poorly that it looked like he was grimacing through pain. “It’s important for us to preserve our traditions.”

                “Why didn’t you just _say_ so!” Florea clapped her hands beside her cheek, swooning like as school girl. “A traditional wedding of the home planet of the Paladins of Voltron! My, what fun!”

                “Fun,” Keith pressed out between grit teeth.

                “Cypria!” the queen pointed to the handmaiden importantly. “Please get all the information you can about their wedding customs so we can begin preparations immediately!”

                “I’d be more than happy to fill her in,” Pidge offered helpfully, much to Florea’s delight. Shiro felt a knot in his stomach untie – Pidge would be the least likely to mess up the explanation or pull some sort of cruel joke.

                “Hooooooly shit,” said Lance, approaching the couple. “So you guys are really gonna do it? You’re gonna tie the knot?”

                “We’d love to be able to honor our hosts,” Shiro non-answered, rubbing Keith’s shoulders as the red paladin seethed in Lance’s general direction.

                “Are you absolutely certain?” Allura inquired in a low voice. “We could simply just leave. The Apiseans’ ships aren’t powerful enough to follow us through a worm hole…”

                “I’ll talk to you later,” Shiro muttered to her out of the corner of his mouth. “Yes,” he said louder, “We’ve never been surer of anything.”

                “Nope,” said Keith, still speaking through his teeth. The look on his face was rapidly approaching manic. “Never. More. Sure.”

                “Mellifera, Ligustica!” the queen cried, causing two of the maids preening her skirts to snap to attention. “Please attend to the Black and Red Paladin’s preparations for the ceremony. Off with you Cypria!” She turned to Allura, beaming as if she hadn’t been throwing a tantrum five minutes earlier. “Please come with me Princess, I’ll have my maidens attend you.”

                “Oh, thank you,” Allura said politely, joining her side.

                “Cerana and Carnica, please contact the drones to have them help the others prepare,” the queen said, amiably linking arms with Allura, who was smiling nervously. The two attendants she addressed began to corral Hunk, Lance, and Coran. As they passed Shiro and Keith, Hunk sobbed out another “congratulations”, Lance just stared in absolute bewilderment, and Coran stepped up beside them to set a heavy hand on each of their shoulders.

                “You know, this isn’t the first time we’ve had a paladin get married, but it’s certainly the first time they’ve married each other!” he said to them. “I know this all must feel sudden, but I’m very proud of you both. Ahhh, look at me, I’m going to end up like Hunk if I keep this up.” He removed a handkerchief to dab at his eyes.

                “Thanks, Coran,” said Shiro as he was peeled away from Keith by the maid assigned to help him. “I’ll, uh, see you later?” he added over his shoulder to Keith, who was being dragged in the opposite direction by the worker bee.

                “Yeah. Later,” Keith said as he allowed himself to be guided towards one of the spiraling spires where the Apiseans made their homes. Once he was out of earshot of anyone else, he mumbled to himself: “We didn’t even get to have sex.”

                “What was that, my lord?” the alien quipped.

                “Nothing,” lied Keith.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, oh my gosh you guys! What a positive reaction! I'm so lucky and thankful to have received so many kudos and kind reviews, each one of them completely makes my day! I'm so glad that I can make everyone laugh with my work <3
> 
> Also, I saw a lot of you mentioning that you're excited to see how Keith reacts to finding out he's Galra. Well, this work is part of a series (not sure how long its gonna be lmao) and Keith doesn't find out until later on, so it won't be addressed in this story. But its gonna happen, I promise ;D
> 
> Until then, enjoy the shenanigans!
> 
> (Trigger warning for mention of past rape/sexual slavery/torture in this chapter)

 

                Shiro was ushered into what appeared to be a sizable hotel room by his attendant, who identified herself as Mellifera. Once she shut the doors behind them, she leaned on the door frame and released a huge breath.

                “Crisis averted!” she cheered, turning towards Shiro with her palms presented upwards.

                “Uh?” Shiro said, holding out his hands as well. Mellifera turned his hands palms-down and slapped her hands up into his triumphantly.

                “That was _soooo_ cool of you, my dude,” she said casually, crossing the room to what looked like a glass box, next to which appeared to be a roll of white fabric. She tapped the top of it and a little screen burst to life. “Come ‘ere, it needs to scan you to get your measurements.”

                “Uhm, okay,” Shiro complied hesitantly, stepping closer to the cube. “What am I wearing?”

                “Whatever you want!” Mellifera smiled. “We don’t have many drones, so we have to synthesize any clothes for guests here. Just think of what you want to wear and it’ll print it out. Any color, any style. If I were you, I’d choose something crazy – she’d be too stupid to even know you were making fun of her!”

                “I get the feeling you don’t exactly…?” Shiro hedged as the machine scanned him with a soft green light.

                “Like her? _Fuck_ no. Literally the way this works is that when a queen is born, some of us leave with her and start a new township on a nearby planet when she’s old enough,” Mellifera snorted. “Her mother used to read her all sorts of trashy princess stories when she was little, and now she thinks that this is the way she has to act,” she scowled. “Hopefully I’ll get to leave when she _finally_ has her first kid. For someone who’s so insistent on _you_ getting married, she’s sure picky about the drone she’s going to end up with. Man, you did us a huuuuuge solid with that brat. This is probably super embarrassing for you, right?”

                “It’s a little—.”

                “Man I feel so sorry for you, fam. I mean all this stuff about the old gods and the springs is pretty much all made up, obvs. We’d totally sneak you out, but the tantrum that’d result in? _Whew_ , you sure are lucky your princess seems _sane_.”

                Shiro was beginning to wonder if the translator on the Castle of Lions was malfunctioning, or if Mellifera actually spoke in the Apisean equivalent of a Californian accent. But thankfully, she had seemed to stop chattering for the time being. He stared down at the glass top of the synthesizer and closed his eyes, focusing on what he felt was most appropriate to wear. As if by magic, the grey and black men’s wedding kimono from his mothers’ wedding photos appeared on the screen. A shot of nostalgia hit him as Mellifera confirmed the outfit and the machine whirred to life.

                It wasn’t as if it was his _real_ wedding, but he keenly missed the two women and silently wished they could have been there. His mom would’ve gotten a hoot out of it, if anything. Okaa-san probably would’ve been fussing over his hair.

                “You okay there?” Mellifera asked. “You look like you’re going to start leaking honey.”

                “I’m okay,” Shiro lied, palming the hint of tears out of his eyes. “I just – I miss my family.”

                “Oh,” said Mellifera softly. “Maybe we could send someone out in a cruiser to get them? Do they live nearby?”

                Shiro smiled sadly, “Thank you for the offer, but they passed away in an accident years ago.”

                “Oh my gosh,” the maid covered her mouth, using the other hand to help feed out the black haori. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pry.”

                “It’s okay,” Shiro responded as she pulled the coat all the way out of the machine and draped it over his shoulders.

                “Is there anything I can do for you?” Mellifera asked as the hakama began to print.

                “Actually,” started Shiro. “Could I send a design over to Keith?”

                “NP,” Mellifera replied. “Just think it up and I’ll send it right over.”

                “Could I send him a note, too?”

                “Sure, just jot it down and I’ll run it over to him while you’re in the shower.”

                “But I just took a ba—.”

                “You didn’t _really_ take much of a bath, did you?” Mellifera smirked at him over her shoulder as she fetched a piece of grey cloth and what appeared to be a pen for him to write with. Shiro blushed.

                “You got me,” he mumbled, accepting the writing implements. He glanced down at the pen, which was emitting a strange smell – the tip of it appeared to be burning. He set the cloth down on the machine and pressed the pen to the fabric, the seared lines flowing out like ink. He returned his attention to the machine, recalling the outfit to the best of his ability. Mellifera hovered over his shoulder, her eyes lighting up as it materialized on the screen.

                “Oh wow,” she gushed. “That looks incredible.”

                “Thanks,” Shiro replied, feeling more than a little flustered. “I just hope he likes it.”

                “I’m sure he will,” the bee responded, tapping something onto the glass surface. The image of the outfit disappeared and the hakama flopped over onto the floor, finished printing. “Let me get the shower started for you.”

                “Thank you,” Shiro said, following her into what appeared to be the bathroom. She pressed her hand to the panel on the wall and began to tweak the screen that glowed to life on its surface. A torrent of heavy rain began to spill in the corner of the room, where a wall was stocked full of more shampoos and soaps than Allura and all four feet of her hair had ever had in her life.

                “No prob,” said Mellifera, stepping out into the little entryway to the bathroom. She shut the door behind her. “I’ll leave your outfit in here so you can change in private. I’ll probably be back when you finish. Bye!”

                “Bye,” Shiro offered, hearing the door close behind her. Taking a deep sigh, he stepped out into the little entryway she’d been standing in and started on removing his armor. Halfway through removing his cuirass Shiro thought:

                ‘ _I’m getting married. To Keith._ ’

                He set the last piece of armor aside and took a moment to let the thought rest in his head.

                “I’m getting married to Keith,” Shiro said out loud. He felt slightly dizzy – everything had happened in such rapid succession that he really hadn’t had time to process it. Even though it was supposed to be a sham wedding, _still_ —

                “I’m getting married to Keith _right now_ ,” Shiro stated to himself. His voice echoed off the tile walls as he stepped into the bathroom, remembered he was still wearing his bodysuit, took it off, and threw it into the entry room.

                Closing the door behind him he proceeded to advance into the shower. He remembered the flower crown the queen had placed on his head just as the petals began to fall under the onslaught of water. Removing the remains of it, he set it aside on the shelving and took a deep breath.

                ‘ _Just don’t think about it too much, crazy_ ,’ Shiro told himself, resting the top of his head against the tiles. ‘ _It doesn’t really mean anything._ ’

                But did it really not? If Shiro wanted to fake-marry anyone, he wanted it to be Keith. Hell, if Shiro wanted to _real_ -marry anyone, he wanted it to be Keith. They were still only nineteen and twenty-one, but it had been something that had crossed Shiro’s mind at least once or twice. Settling down together six or seven years down the road didn’t sound too bad to him. And if their experience in the spring was any indication of Keith’s feelings, he was still as madly into Shiro as Shiro was into him. And besides, Shiro loved him. Even though he could only remember bits and pieces of his imprisonment, he was absolutely certain that he’d thought about Keith every day.

                Keith sitting in the window of his dorm, sunlight dappling his guitar as he sang. Keith pulling an unexpected punch and grinning in triumph. Keith’s face turning red as he struggled to breathe through laughter. The look of determination in Keith’s eyes as he tossed a ring for a midway game. The fragility of his tears. The way his eyelids fluttered after they’d been up all night talking. The soft touches, small noises, and the tiny whine in Keith’s throat as his eyes closed and he tilted his head back, repeating Shiro’s first name over and over again in a broken way.

                The Galra could beat Shiro, rape him, break his mind and his pride, but those memories were something that they could never take away. And in the end, Shiro figured he owed a huge part of his sanity to the slim promise of being able to see Keith again. It was the thin thread of hope that he’d kept close to his heart, the secret affection that he’d never let them know, no matter how much information they tortured out of him. He wouldn’t let anything kill that.

                Shiro was certain that if he wanted to marry anyone, he wanted it to be Keith.

* * *

                When he was finished with the shower and had managed to shrug into the black and grey ensemble, Shiro stepped back into the room proper only to be met with the sight of Pidge poking at the clothes printer.

                “Katie,” Shiro greeted her, mildly surprised.

                “Looking good,” she returned with a bright smile. “I like the little fluff ball.”

                Shiro grasped at the white haori himo hanging above his waist. “I have no idea what it’s for,” he admitted. “You look good, too. Very… uh. Shojo manga?”

                “Hey, Rose of Versailles is a _classic_ ,” Pidge returned, pretending to dust off her pauldrons. “Did you know it’s over one hundred and fifty years old?”

                “Can’t say I did,” Shiro laughed, coming up bedside her to pick up the tabi and zori that the machine had spat out during Mellifera’s absence. He sat down on a nearby couch to begin putting on the socks and sandals. Pidge plopped down next to him.

                “What happened to your flower crown?” she asked, pointing at his wet head of hair.

                “Oh,” said Shiro sheepishly. “I accidently drowned it.”

                Pidge snickered, “Nervous or something?”

                “No,” Shiro lied with a deceptively calm smile. “It’s not a real wedding anyway – it’s just a formality for the Queen.”

                “Yeah, Cypria filled us all in,” Pidge told him, flopping down onto her back. “Allura wanted me to tell you she says thanks for the compliance, that it was very diplomatic of you. But man, I’m glad you came up with the ‘cultural exchange’ idea. That would’ve gotten pe-reeeetty awkward.”

                “Yeah, you’re telling me,” Shiro laughed, resting back as well. He stared at her out of the corner of his eye. “You didn’t tell her anything weird about the marriage ceremony, did you?”

                “Typical traditional American ceremony,” Pidge confirmed.

                “Thank God,” Shiro sighed. “I hope there aren’t any surprises.”

                “Doubtful. I mean, it could happen, but Cypria assured me there’d be no more public sex involved,” Pidge confirmed, waving her hands as if to banish the idea.

                “More—? _Pidge_.” Shiro scowled, sitting up to glare down at her. The green paladin laughed, readjusting her flower crown.

                “Hey, I’m not judging you,” she held her hands up, a cattish look crossing her features.

                “We didn’t even—why am I _telling_ you this?!” Shiro smothered his face in his hands, groaning in embarrassment. He seemed to have been doing a lot of that on that particular day.

                “Cause you’re secretly terrified and it’s easy to get your goat when you get like this?” Pidge grinned.

                Shiro shook his head, allowing himself a smile. “How’s everyone else doing?”

                “Well, Allura is pretty pleased, like I said, Lance is still in shock, Hunk won’t stop crying even though we told him it isn’t a real wedding, and Coran seemed oddly disappointed when he found out it wasn’t real.” Pidge listed off. “I think he was really rooting for you two?”

                “Geez…” Shiro ducked his head down, rubbing at the back of his neck. “I’m pretty flattered to have gotten their support, though,” he admitted.

                “Yeah well, I’d be saying ‘congrats’ now, too if it were really happening,” Pidge smiled, taking to her feet. “You two make a cute couple.”

                “…How long did you know, exactly?” Shiro quipped as Pidge made her way towards the door.

                “Probably from the moment he cradled you in his arms to steal you away into the night,” Pidge responded, holding her arms out as if she were Keith carrying away an imaginary Shiro.

                “…It did not happen like that,” Shiro frowned at his teammate.

                “Nope, totally did. I was there. I saw the sexual tension,” Pidge turned back towards the door and promptly existed. Three seconds later she popped her head back in. “By the way, I’m going to go try and bother Keith next. Want me to carry a message along?”

                “Don’t pester him too much,” Shiro asked, feeling genuinely worried. Keith could be like an agitated cat, even on the best of days. “I sent him a note earlier, so that’s fine. Just tell him I hope he’s doing okay.”

                “Can do, boss man!” Pidge saluted at him and the door closed once more before proceeding to pop open again immediately.

                “And Shiro? I take it back,” she smiled softly. “Congratulations.”

* * *

 

                By the time the suns had set and the three pink moons had risen, the town square was literally buzzing with excitement. Fairy lights decorated with flowers and festive paper lanterns criss-crossed overhead, connecting the beautiful blown glass lights that surrounded the rows of chairs and the makeshift altar that had been set up in front of them. Approximately six million flowers spilled everywhere from the sides of seats, to beside tables, and all over the guests. There was a fine dusting of white and red flower petals down the plush carpet that made up the aisle. A band of drones stood next to the altar, tuning what could only be described as electric violins and omnichords.

                Standing nearby was Queen Florea and Princess Allura, who were greeting the townsfolk as they filed in. Allura was dressed in a soft pink and blue empress-line dress, her hair worn down and full of little matching flowers. Towards the altar were the rest of the paladins and Coran, who seemed to be milling around anxiously. Especially Hunk.

                “You guys, what if something goes wrong?” he mumbled under his breath, even though the queen was a good several hundred yards away. He, Lance, and Coran were all wearing duplicates of Pidge’s royal riding habit in their associated colors. Apparently one of the maids had liked the idea.

“What if Keith gets cold feet and runs away?” Hunk was saying.

                “Keith’s not going to run away,” Pidge repeated for what had to be the hundredth time.

                “Why would he want to?” Coran interjected. “It’s the happiest day of his life!”

                “It’s not a real wedding, Coran,” Pidge seemed to be repeating herself a lot that day.

                “Oh, quiznak! Let an old man have his fun!” Coran tutted, adjusting the lapels on his coat.

                “Happiest day of _his_ life? More like happiest day of _mine._ I wish I had a camera,” Lance said, staring dreamily into the sky. “Keith in a wedding dress. Man, if we were at home, I’d post it all over the Internet. He’s going to be so embarrassed,” he concluded with a fat grin.      

                “Okay, one: are we even sure he’s wearing a dress? And two: what’s embarrassing about a dude wearing a dress?” Hunk stared around, a bit perplexed.

                “Lance is living in the twenty-first century apparently,” Pidge confirmed. “Back then, clothes had _gender_.”

                “Whaaaat?” Hunk responded. “You gotta be kidding me.”

                “Hey, my 2010’s ‘dudebro’ aesthetic is not something to be made fun of,” Lance responded defensively. “Dresses were originally for girls.”

                “And if you’re going by that logic, high heels were originally made for male butchers,” Pidge rolled her eyes.

                “Stop your bickering gents, here comes the groom!” Coran exclaimed, pointing towards where Shiro was being seen to the side of the altar by Mellifera. It appeared that his flower crown had been replaced by one made up of the Apisean equivalent of anemone and snapdragons. Upon seeing him, Hunk immediately burst into tears once more.

                “ _Hunk_!” Pidge turned to him, sounding completely exasperated.

                “I’m sorry!” the yellow paladin sniffled. “I just get so choked up at weddings! When my cousin Alani got married last summer, I was so happy that I cried for like three days.”

                “It’s not a real wedding,” Lance reminded him grumpily, clearly fed up with all the crying.

                “I know it’s just—aw _man_ Shiro, you look great, man,” Hunk threw his arms around Shiro for the second time that day and squeezed him as tightly as he could.

                “Absolutely strapping!” Coran added in.

                “Thanks Hunk, Coran,” Shiro choked out, relieved to be set down once more and catch his breath. He spotted the queen and princess welcoming the guests and then began to look around the town square. “Where’s Keith?”

                “I told them to hide him from you until the wedding,” Pidge reported, her smile mischievous. “Like I told you: typical American ceremony.”

                Shiro tugged at his kimono’s collar a little. Keith had a short fuse and Shiro was more than aware that his boyfriend would be in ultimate grumpy territory by now, if not completely wracked with anxiety.

                ‘ _He’s a big boy, he can take care of himself_ ,’ Shiro told himself, but couldn’t help but feel like he needed to be there to help Keith ease any potential anxiety. He certainly felt like having Keith there would help with his. Despite this, he turned to Pidge for answers.

                “Did you get to see him?”

                “Yeah, he seemed pretty out of it,” Pidge scratched her chin, staring up at the moons contemplatively. “But not in a bad way. More like in a ‘cat resigned to its doom’ sort of way.”

                Lance burst out in laughter, “Oh my God, that reminds me: one time my mom put a sweater on the cat and he just rolled around the floor for like forty-five minutes before he just _gave up_.”

                “Yeah, I don’t think he’d been rolling around the floor,” Pidge responded, snickering a little.

                “My, there sure are a lot of guests,” Coran observed, peeking around the altar to observe the rapidly-filling seats. “I mean – not as many as the marriage between the Princess’ mother and father. Why – there were at the very _least_ three thousand souls there that day. And millions watching from home and outside the castle at that. Why, I was just a boy at that time and the Queen was the most miraculous beauty I had ever seen, done to the nines in—.”

                “Okay, I’m sorry to interrupt here, but can we save Coran Story Time for a little later?” Lance cut in. “Like ‘when Lance is drunk off of honey mead’ later?”

                Shiro frowned at him, “You’re eighteen.”

                “Hey buddy, if I can pilot a magical lion robot through space and risk my life on a daily basis, I can get shitfaced if I want to,” Lance argued immediately.

                “Okay, good point,” Shiro sighed, knowing when he was defeated. After the battle, the panic attack, and all the shenanigans that had ensued, he was ready to just lay down and sleep for eighteen hours while his team had the run of the show.

                “Hey, does that mean I can drink, too?” Pidge cut in.

                “Don’t push it,” Shiro shoved at her shoulder playfully.

                “Just make sure he doesn’t see,” Coran added to the green paladin in a low whisper, offering her a wink.

                “I already got a flask full of sangria in my pocket,” Pidge grinned, happily patting the container through the leg of her pants. Coran chuckled and returned his attention to Allura and Florea, who were walking down the aisle.

                “All right there, princess?” Coran inquired.

                “We’re just about ready to begin!” Florea announced enthusiastically. “Please get into position on stage!”

                “Altar,” Pidge corrected gently.

                “Oh, right, on the altar!” the queen raised her hands up to her cheeks like an excited child. “Please show the Black Paladin where to stand?”

                “Of course, Your Majesty,” Pidge complied, grabbing Shiro by the wrist and pulling him up onto the altar next to her and Lance.

                Opposite them stood Coran and Hunk, and between them Allura and Florea faced the audience. The queen beamed around at the townspeople before her face dimmed and she turned to the band before whispering loudly: “ _Play the music_!”

                The drones stood to attention and started up their instruments. A high-pitched flighty song in what had to be in a three thirty-second time signature began to fill the square. Shiro stared down to the end of the aisle, feeling his throat tighten. The speedy song wasn’t doing too terribly much to help calm his nerves. Despite the farce, he was still on display in front of at least three hundred people, and the last time that had happened he’d ended up with a handful of scars. Taking a deep breath to steel his nerves, Shiro continued to look for Keith.

                Finally, he stepped into the lights, arms crossed over his chest and eyes shifting around him anxiously before he spotted Shiro.

                It was like seeing each other drew all the tension out of the space. The rapid music fell to a faint sound in the background, the faces of the audience blurred out into nonexistence. It was just Keith and Shiro staring at each other down a long aisle. And if it was possible, Shiro immediately felt himself fall deeper in love.

                Keith visibly took a deep breath and straightened his shoulders before he dropped his hands to his sides, grasping – was that a _bouquet_? – in front of him. With even strides, he walked down the aisle and finally crested the steps up the altar and stood in front of Shiro.

                “Beautiful” wasn’t exactly a word Shiro had often assigned to Keith before. Sexy? Definitely. Handsome, of course. And even occasionally cute. But the word beautiful had only crossed Shiro’s mind once before, and that was the first time that Keith’s eyes had fluttered close and he’d said Shiro’s name over and over again.

                But he really did look beautiful now. His hair was pulled back into a ponytail, crowned with bright red amaryllis and light sprigs of catnip flowers. Wrapped around him was an identical version of the scarlet wedding kimono that had hung in Shiro’s mothers’ room for years. White and red flowers, deep jade bushes and leaves all surrounded in golden thread covered the length of the furisode, Keith’s waist secured with a jet black obi decorated with aureate fans.

                Shiro’s brain all but short-circuited seeing Keith wearing the same kimono that his parents had told him he or his partner could wear at their wedding. Shiro couldn’t believe that Keith had actually gone through with wearing something so ornate.

                He must have been making a face because Keith handed the bouquet over to Lance and took both of Shiro’s hands before leaning in close to say, “Save that look for _after_ the wedding.”

                Shiro coughed, attempting to smother down a blush before the two dropped their right hands and turned to face Allura and Queen Florea.

                The insect queen cleared her throat and removed a piece of paper from the inside of her fur collar, opening it and proudly declaring to the assembled:

                “Mawwiage.”

                Keith and Shiro immediately turned to glare incredulous daggers at Pidge, who was pink-faced and shaking with the effort of containing her laughter. It appeared that she’d been in on the maid’s “humiliate the queen” plan all along. Hunk let out a high whining noise, eyes bulging as he attempted to restrain himself. Over on the other side of the stage, Lance was all but vibrating.

                The queen cleared her throat at seeing that the attention of the grooms had been drawn away from her.

                “ _Mawwiage_ ,” she repeated importantly. “Is what bwings us togethew today. Mawwiage, that bwessed awwangement, that dweam within a dweam. And wove, twue wove, wiww fowwow you fowevah and evah… so tweasuwe your— _what_ on Apis is so _funny_?!”

                Lance finally broke down, a loud “PAHAHAHA!” emerging from his open mouth as he bent in two to press his hands to his knees. Hunk lost it next, actually actively crying from laughter, and Pidge broke out into giggles.

                “I’m leaving,” Keith said, turning around to climb down off of the altar. Shiro grabbed him by the hand and gently pulled him back to the queen.

                “ _Paladins_!” Allura hissed, her cheeks turning bright pink. “This is absolutely _no_ way to act at a _wedding_!”

                “We apologize,” Shiro – who was just moments away from breaking down in stress laughter himself – responded immediately. “Everyone, calm down!”

                A light chorus of “sorry” was provided next before everyone straightened up to attention. Coran looked absolutely lost.

                The queen looked down at the paper before huffing and tossing it aside, “Well, no matter! I’m a queen, I don’t need human lines to officiate a marriage. Black Paladin, Red Paladin, do you have any last words?”

                ‘ _Oh God, she’s going to kill us all_ ,’ Shiro thought, before he realized what was being asked of him.

                Vows.

_He’d forgotten to write his own vows._

                While Shiro’s brain went into buffering, Keith extracted one of the grey pieces of cloth from his obi and turned to Shiro.

                “Shiro,” he said steadily, although his hands were shaking. Shiro immediately reached out to take them, but Keith shook his head a little and the black paladin dropped his arms. “I’m not—I can’t really express myself very well – I think you know that better than anyone. But I just wanted to say – that I’m… I missed you.” He dropped his hands, the vows falling to the wayside. “I missed you every day you were gone, and I promised myself that I would never forget you, or give up on finding you because you’re the only person who… _gets_ me on a level I’m not really comfortably saying in front of hundreds of strangers.”

                Keith dropped the paper and finally took Shiro’s hands, talking softly so that no one but Shiro could hear him, “You’re the only person I’ve ever wanted, no matter what.”

                It took a moment for Shiro to register his own words being quoted back at him. He realized he was leaning in for a kiss before it was too late. The crowd burst into enthusiastic cheers, Pidge and Hunk whooping in celebration. When he pulled away from Keith, Shiro saw Lance and Coran holding one another and sobbing furiously over his shoulder.

                “Wait, I didn’t even finish!” Florea pouted. “Oh, _quiznak!_ ” She stamped her foot and declared loudly over the din: “By the power invested in me, I now declare you married! May Mallophora bless you with many days of bliss and healthy grubs for years to come!”

                Keith pulled away from Shiro, who was still hugging him, “Grubs?”                                  

                But the exit music has already started and Allura was all but pushing them down the aisle. Keith and Shiro joined hands, just about tripping down the stairs and rushing down the aisle. The Apiseans around them tossed little flower bulbs and handfuls of seeds at them in place of rice. Keith narrowly ducked a particularly fat bulb, which proceeded to bean Lance right in the chin.

                Allura ushered them away from the ceremony at a half-jog and towards a section of the square that had been set aside for the reception. As soon as Keith and Shiro arrived at their table, the two doubled over in laughter, grabbing at each other’s shoulders.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While you guys are waiting for updates, please check out my girlfriend CheshireCity's Shiro/Keith story Pressure Suit ! She's an incredibly talented writer and her story is absolutely destroying me in the best way.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Annnnd here it is! Thank you all so much for reading, this was an absolute blast to write and I'm so happy that everyone was able to get some laughs out of this. Just to let you all know, this is only the first part of six-part series! Part two is a oneshot, which I will be posting on Thursday! I'm currently working on part three.
> 
> Again, I hope to have respectfully conveyed and portrayed Keith's physical sex, and if I have written anything offensive, please let me know immediately so that I can do my best to learn and correct it. 
> 
> Very small TW for this chapter for a brief instance of Shiro getting mildly triggered, but nothing huge.

                “I have no idea what that ‘mawwige’ shenanigan was all about,” Allura panted through her own giggles. “But I’m still very proud of the both of you. Thank you for doing this for us.”

                “Of course,” said Shiro, actually feeling confident in his words this time around. He was still holding Keith close and the two didn’t seem to be able to stop grinning at one another stupidly. The other paladins filed in next alongside Coran, and there was much playful scolding of Pidge followed by a group breakdown of laughter as she explained the joke to Allura and Coran. Hunk seemed to have been cured of his tears, but Lance was still sniffing violently every three seconds.

                “I thought that you felt like this thing was a huge joke?” Pidge smirked at him over her shoulder.

                “Yeah, I know, but—,” Lance wiped furiously at his eyes. “That ending was _beautiful_ there, man. How could I laugh at _that_? ‘S got me all emotional.”

                “Well calm down, people are probably going to want pictures and I don’t want you looking like an idiot in them,” Keith grumbled Lance’s way. Lance snorted loudly and pointed at Keith accusatorily.

                “Looks like _you’re_ the one who needs to calm down, bridezilla!”

                “ _What_ did you just say?!”

                “Everyone relax,” Shiro said out of the corner of his mouth, which was fixed into a smile as the queen approached. Amongst her, the other Apiseans were quickly filling out the celebration space.

                “Well! I can say I’m a bit perplexed at what happened at the end there,” the queen huffed a little. “But overall, it was a beautiful ceremony! I haven’t had such fun in years! Congratulations to both of you! And thank you for allowing us to be a part of your culture!”

                “It’s our pleasure, Your Majesty,” Shiro repeated for what was probably the tenth time that day. But again, he actually meant it that time.

                “Sit, sit!” Florea buzzed, gesturing towards the table behind them laid out with a spread of crystal ware. “Let us begin the feast!”

                “I really could go for some food right now,” Pidge commented, sitting down at one of the tables perpendicular to the grooms’ table. “I haven’t eaten all day.”

                “I could eat a hundred feasts,” Lance said enthusiastically, sitting next to Allura. When she giggled he added in: “But like. You know. In a gentlemanly way.”

                “Feel free to dig in!” the queen said, sitting down on Allura’s other side. “We’ve prepared our finest food for you.”

                A handful of maids spilled into their sitting area, each taking hold of the cover of crystal ware. With practiced ease, they lifted them in unison, revealing bowls full of flowers.

                “…Oh. Salad,” Lance said, sounding sincerely disappointed.

                “Oh man, there’s carnations in here!” Hunk said, clearly excited. “Does anyone have some hot water? I can put them in tea!”

                “Petals!” Florea declared, clapping her hands happily. “Fortunately, we seem to have quite a few genii of flowers edible to your race on our planet! Rose, lavender, carnations – the list goes on! I hope you enjoy!”

                “Thank you, Queen Florea,” Allura said with all the dignity of a diplomat and, finding no utensils, followed the queen’s example of picking up a petal and popping it into her mouth. Slowly, everyone followed suit until the flower petals were all gone and were replaced by bowls of rose water.

                “Do we have any MREs in the castle?” Keith mumbled to Shiro, awkwardly sipping out of the side of the bowl.

                “Yeah, I think we have some of that green goo,” Shiro responded just as quietly.

                “I’ve never been more excited to eat that crap,” Keith sighed and Shiro laughed softly, taking Keith’s hand and kissing it.

                “You guys are so gross,” Pidge laughed into her own bowl.

                “We’re allowed to be,” Keith retorted. “We just got married.”

                Once the rose water was cleared from the table, a small glass dish was set before Keith and Shiro.

                “What is this?” Keith asked, looking at the contents skeptically.

                “Honeysuckle nectar, gathered freshly today!” Florea explained. “The Green Paladin explained that it was traditional to feed one another a sweet dish called… caaaake?” she cocked her head, drawing the ‘a’ out awkwardly long. “But we don’t have that here, so I thought our traditional dessert would be sufficient.”

                Keith and Shiro stared at each other, and then back down at the nectar, both completely oblivious as to how they were supposed to feed it to each other without a spoon. Shiro hesitantly picked up the bowl, shrugged, and pressed it to Keith’s lips. Keith pulled back, scowling.

                “If you get this all over me—.”

                “I won’t,” Shiro promised.

                He ignored what sounded suspiciously like Lance muttering “Bet he’s said _that_ before.” And tilted the bowl up just a fraction. Keith swallowed and grabbed it before all but shoving it towards Shiro, who took a quick enough sip to fill his mouth with the fragrant fluid. They turned expectantly towards Florea, who – once again – was clapping her hands in delight. This seemed to be one of her standard modes, the other one being “wailing”.

                “Bring out the surprise!” she cried. Shiro’s heart instantly fell into his stomach like it had been replaced by a massive rock. Keith looked like he’d swallowed a mouthful of gutter water.

                “Oh God no,” the red paladin muttered, visibly scooting away from the table. Shiro didn’t try to stop him, he felt ready to run as well.

                “‘Surprise’?” he echoed, voice full of trepidation.

                “Yes, the surprise! And the surprise is that we’ve had contact with your species before!” Florea declared, making a grand gesticulation towards the dance floor, where a massive machine was being rolled out. “We’ve only recently decoded it, and I thought it would be perfect to dance to!” she clapped her hands twice. “Drones?”

                The machine made a loud crackling noise for a moment before the sound of an electric guitar began to blare throughout the square.

                “No way,” said Pidge.

                “Yes! About fifty years ago, a primitive human aircraft was launched through a wormhole and crash-landed on Apis! This is the golden music disc that we retrieved from it!”

                “ _Deep down in Louisiana, close to New Orleans, way back up in the woods amongst the evergreens_ ,” the lyrics went.

                “That’s the Golden Record from the Voyager!” Pidge exclaimed. “That’s by Chuck Berry! It was the most controversial thing they added to the record!”

                “Is this the song from Back to the Future?” Lance asked.

                “Yes!” Pidge all but cheered.

                “Noooo waaaay,” said Hunk. “I can’t believe that’s the song from Back to the Future! That movie’s, like, _ancient_.”

                “It’s the same age as Princess Bride,” Lance informed him.

                “Do either of you have any idea how _scientifically significant this is?!_ ” Pidge shouted over the song, climbing up to inspect the machine playing the record. “Your majesty, do you have any remains of the spacecraft?”

                “I think we might have some of the parts,” the queen said, pressing a finger to her lips in contemplation. Around them, the Apiseans were spilling onto the dance floor, all proceeding to get down to Johnny B. Goode.

                “Welp, next to finding out about aliens, this is officially the weirdest day of my life,” Keith said, completely deadpan.

                “You know, I am completely in agreement with you,” Shiro replied, shaking his head as Hunk peeled Pidge off of the machine and dragged her over to Lance. The yellow paladin started up a funny dance, which Pidge immediately began to do as well. Lance burst into laughter and picked up on the steps before they were joined by Allura and Florea, who seemed to want to learn the ancient earth dance of Gangam Style. “At least they seem to be having fun.”

                “A blast,” Keith added tonelessly as Coran joined in with an Altean jig of his own.

                “How are you doing?” Shiro asked after a short pause, smoothing his thumb over Keith’s hand. The red paladin shrugged.

                “You know, I was pretty irritated at first, but this isn’t too bad,” he said, smirking at the Gangam-style-Altean-Jig hybrid that was being created on the dance floor.

                “I thought I was going to die of embarrassment,” Shiro admitted. Keith looked relieved, squeezing his boyfriend’s hand.

                “Good, I thought I was alone on that. You kept yourself together so well—accept when you started crying when I showed up,” he added in with a grin.

                “I did _not_ cry,” Shiro said insistently, sitting up straight in his chair. Despite this, he was still smiling.

                “You were about three seconds away from crying harder than Lance, Coran, and Hunk combined,” Keith laughed. “You looked like you were melting.”

                “I was,” Shiro said before he could catch himself. Keith proceeded to blush and ducked his head into the sleeve of his furisode. “I didn’t think you would wear it.”

                “Why not?” Keith responded, peeking out from behind the long sleeve.

                “Well, it’s traditionally—.”

                “Fuck tradition,” Keith cut in. “Your note said it was your mom’s and she’d always wanted you or your partner to wear it.” He frowned. “Were you seriously going to wear this?”

                “Probably over a white yukata or something, but I think it looks much better on you,” Shiro insisted. Keith didn’t blush this time, but just smiled and stood.

                “Come on, I need to take a walk,” he said, pulling Shiro up by the hand.

                “Do you think it’s okay if we go?” Shiro asked, looking at the dance floor. The Golden Record was beginning to play whale noises, to which Hunk and Pidge were still aggressively Gangam Styling. The rest of the Apiseans had joined in, and looked like they were having the time of their lives.

                “Yeah, I think they’re pretty occupied,” Keith surmised. “Besides, this was more about their brat queen than us, so I don’t think we’ll be missed.”

                “You know what? I agree. Let’s go,” Shiro stood as well and the two slipped away from the dance floor behind a trellis thick with ivy. They wandered around the edge of the town, the whale songs and celebratory sounds distant noise on the wind. After a while of searching in silence, they finally came across the path that led through the forest. The leaves on the trees above had taken on a bioluminescent glow, conveniently lighting the way through the forest for them.

                “It’s so weird,” Keith mused, looking down at one of the hot springs they passed. “It seems like earlier today was a week ago.”

                “Well, things _did_ go from one to ten pretty quickly,” Shiro said in reply. Hesitantly, he attempted to change the subject. “Earlier tonight, when Pidge was teasing us—.”

                “When _wasn’t_ Pidge teasing us?” Keith cut in with a grumble.

                “Right after dinner, when she said we were being gross?” Shiro laughed, “You said we were allowed to because we’re married.”

                Keith attempted to cover up his blush with a scowl, “You know what I meant.”

                “I know, but… it made me really happy to hear that,” Shiro explained, taking Keith’s hand once more. They cut through the copse and started up the hill where the lions were stationed. As they approached, the Black Lion seemed to stir, the soft golden lights of its eyes flickering on. It shifted from a sitting position down into a crouch, its maw opening for Keith and Shiro to enter.

                “Why?” Keith muttered at last as they climbed up into the cockpit. Shiro chuckled and began to shuffle through the supply cabinets in the back. He tossed Keith an MRE and the red paladin caught it out of the air and set it aside. Unfastening the black obi, he slid it off and draped it unceremoniously over Shiro’s seat. Keith let the furisode fall to his shoulders, dressed in a white kimono and a peach-colored nagajuban underneath. He then proceeded to settle onto the ground on top of his makeshift bed. Shiro approached, toeing off his sandals and sitting down next to Keith.

                “Does there have to be a reason?” he asked, setting his own dinner aside and running his fingers through Keith’s hair. As his hand slid down the other’s cheek, the red paladin pressed a kiss into Shiro’s palm.

                “It’s like you actually want to be married to me,” Keith mumbled, burying his face into Shiro’s hand.

                Shiro felt his heart do something funny in his chest. Keith was still staring at him over his fingers almost nervously, waiting for a reply.

                “Well,” Shiro said softly. “What if I said I did?”

                Keith looked taken aback, as if he hadn’t even considered that response as a possibility. “What—,” he choked out, looking around the cockpit as if the panels would reveal the secret to Shiro’s answer. “What. No.”

                “Yes,” Shiro laughed, gently pulling his hand away. “I mean, I think we should date for a few more years. We’re pretty young.”

                “Are you proposing to me?” Keith almost yelled. “Because _don’t do that_.”

                “I’m not!” Shiro said defensively, lightly touching Keith’s chest. “I mean, I think it’s a little late for that,” he added in a teasing tone.

                “Ha ha,” Keith said flatly, pushing his hand away. “But seriously—.”

                “Maybe one day?” Shiro settled, wrapping an arm around his boyfriend and bringing him to his chest. Keith responded with a noncommittal grumble. They sat in comfortable silence for several minutes until the lights of the cockpit dimmed, letting the ambient glow of the petal-pink moons light up the inside of the Lion.

                “Well,” Keith responded at great length. “If we do get married, I hope it isn’t _anything_ like what happened tonight… except for when I saw you.”

                Shiro’s heart was doing flips again. He tilted his head to look down at Keith, who seemed more contemplative than embarrassed.

                “Oh yeah?” Shiro gently encouraged an answer.

                “It was – I kind of wanted to _kill everyone in the vicinity_ until I saw you and then – I don’t know, it was _magnetic_ ,” Keith admitted. “I think everything else stopped mattering then.”

                “I know what you mean, things changed when I saw you,” Shiro softly kissed Keith’s jaw. “You looked so beautiful.”

                “Shut the fuck up.”

                “I mean it,” Shiro said, slightly exasperated at having to insist upon his feelings. “You really are beautiful, Keith.”

                “I’m going to throw up if you keep saying sappy shit like that,” Keith warned, nose wrinkling in distain.

                “Sappy? I didn’t even get to say my vows,” Shiro teased, pecking Keith on the nose.

                “What did you write?” Keith asked, stroking Shiro’s cheek.

                “Wellllll,” Shiro winced, cracking open one eye to look at Keith apologetically, “I kind of… forgot about them?”

                Keith stared at Shiro, completely blasé. “You forgot your vows.”

                “Yes?” Shiro grit out hesitantly. “I wasn’t exactly prepared; the whole ordeal kind of caught me off guard.”

                “I guess I can forgive you for that,” Keith shrugged, beginning to loosen the obi of his kimono. It slid off his shoulders along with the furisode – Shiro could see the outline of his chest and collarbone though the thin fabric of the nagajuban. “But what do you think you would’ve said?”

                Shiro paused before recalling the thoughts he’d had in the shower. “I think I would’ve said…” he began slowly, brushing away a piece of hair that had fallen down from Keith’s ponytail. “That thinking about you was the only thing that kept me sane when I was imprisoned – about how I’d never let _anything_ take away the experiences I had with you. I would’ve talked about how important you are to me not only as my boyfriend, but as my _best_ friend and how I could never imagine spending my life with anyone but you. What do you think about that?”

                Keith paused, his expression unreadable as he slid his hand around the back of Shiro’s head and pulled him down for a kiss.

                “I think that I feel the same way,” Keith said very softly, his lips brushing against Shiro’s before they met. Shiro cupped Keith’s cheek and leaned into the kiss, his other hand encircling Keith’s waist. They kissed for several minutes, lips simply pressing and moving against one another before Shiro dipped Keith back down onto the kimono spilled over the floor and began to kiss him in earnest. Keith was the first to lick at Shiro’s mouth, his tongue tracing the black paladin’s lower lip before Shiro opened his mouth and Keith began to greedily suck on his tongue. Shiro made an appreciative noise and dipped it deeper, ghosting the tip over the roof of Keith’s mouth. The red paladin moaned softly and spread his legs to accommodate Shiro’s hips, snaking his calf around one of Shiro’s.

                Every moment was a press to get closer. Their kisses were much more frenzied than the ones they’d shared before Shiro’s imprisonment. It was as if in their separation they really had become magnetized towards one another. No kiss was deep enough, no press of skin was close enough. They struggled against one another in a hopeless attempt to get closer. Shiro finally sat up on his knees and shucked off his haori while Keith all but ripped off the remainder of his clothes. They surged against one another, bare chests pressed, Keith’s hands clasping Shiro’s face and pushing him closer, closer, never close enough.

                Keith tilted back his head when Shiro nuzzled into the crook of his neck, lapping up the line of his throat and pressing kisses to the sensitive spot behind his ear. His breath ghosted into Keith’s ears, sending silvery shivers coursing down his throat and into his spine. The heat of Shiro’s prosthetic on Keith’s hip was unbearable in contrast to the cool skin grasping the other side. Shiro kissed down his chest, the thumb of his prosthetic sweeping just below Keith’s pectoral as Shiro ran his tongue over the opposite nipple.

                The response was startling, Keith’s sudden intake of breath far more rewarding than Shiro ever remembered it being. He closed his mouth around the sensitive nub and sucked gently, reveling in the way Keith’s chest began to shutter in response. Shiro rolled the other between the thumb and forefinger of the prosthetic, hoping the contrast in temperature would prove pleasurable. Keith writhed when Shiro gently bit down on his nipple before changing his attention to the other one.

                “Shiro, you’re driving me _crazy_ ,” Keith grit out, fisting his hands in Shiro’s hair. The other laughed, lips gently moving down the flat of Keith’s stomach in response. Keith’s breath hitched as Shiro moved down his body, shifting to the side to kiss and tease his hips.

                With a feather-light touch, Shiro trailed his fingers over Keith’s hard cock, the sweet noise of startled relief that the red paladin made surging straight down Shiro’s core. He flicked his tongue over the tip and took the head into his mouth, freezing when a feeling of panic edged over his shoulders and down into his heart.

                “Sh-Shiro?” Keith panted, instantly attuned to his boyfriend’s reaction.

                Shiro shook his head, stroking Keith’s dick as he rose up to kiss him.

                “I think I’d like to try something else,” he proposed. Keith nodded fervently.

                “Fuck yeah, do whatever you want,” he responded immediately.

                Shiro hesitated before asking: “Could I eat you out?”

                _That_ certainly got Keith’s attention. He immediately popped up on his elbows, eyes blown wide. They’d never really experimented with Keith’s second set of genitals other than Shiro grinding his palm against it. He understood that Keith was ashamed of it, enough to only ever have anal. And while it broke Shiro’s heart that Keith loathed his body so much, he’d never pressed the issue before.

                “What? Why?” Keith asked.

                “I’d feel more comfortable with it,” Shiro responded honestly. “I don’t know if I could—.”

                “It’s okay,” Keith cut in, immediately understanding. “If… if you really want to try it that way, I’d be fine with that.”

                Shiro felt the tension unfurl from his shoulders. “Thank you,” he said sincerely. “Also, I don’t think we have the right supplies to do it the other way?”

                Keith stared blankly at Shiro for a solid five seconds. He was still panting, his hair almost completely fallen out of the ponytail. He mouthed ‘the other way?’ before his eyes widened in realization.

                “ _Oh_. Oh shit, that’s right,” Keith said, running a hand through his bangs. “Yeah I – no, don’t put it in my ass. I think that’s a bad idea. We could… we could try it with – you know.”

                “Really?” Shiro asked, stoking the underside of Keith’s knee. “Because we’ve kind of been talking around the issue? I want to be really clear here, Keith. Is it okay if we have penetrative sex?”

                “You wanna fuck my cunt,” Keith said, looking away from Shiro and staring hard at the ground. Shiro recoiled a little at the harsh nature of his boyfriend’s words.

                “No,” he said softly, taking Keith’s cheek and pressing their lips together. “I want to make love with you in whatever way is most comfortable and pleasurable to you, Keith.”

                Shiro didn’t miss the little whimper Keith produced under his breath. Keith pulled away just a fraction to say: “You’re melting me.”

                Shiro smiled and dipped in for another kiss.

                “What would you like me to do, Keith?” he asked. Keith glanced away.

                “You… you can eat me out, if you want,” he responded softly. “Let’s see what happens from there?”

                “Are you okay with being fingered?” Shiro asked, wanting clear consent. Keith hesitated for a moment and then nodded.

                “Yeah, I’d be okay with that,” he responded after a pause.

                “Okay,” said Shiro, and they kissed again, open-mouthed and deep. He pulled away, mouthing the side of Keith’s leg. “Thank you.”

                “I trust you,” Keith said in reply. Shiro smiled, feeling a look of absolute adoration cross his features. He nipped very lightly at Keith’s thigh, loving the tension there and the pleasured shift of the red paladin’s hips that came in response. Again, he slid back down Keith’s torso and pressed small kisses into his hips.

                “Tell me what feels good, okay?” Shiro requested, to which Keith responded with another little nod.

                Shiro dipped back down between Keith’s legs, stroking his cock back to full hardness in one hand while he pressed his lips behind it.

                Keith made a strangled noise that was somewhere between a gasp and a groan, and Shiro immediately pulled away.

                “Don’t stop,” Keith panted. His back was arched and his eyes looked electric. Smiling, Shiro returned his attentions to the soft bundle of nerves that he’d found there, hesitantly flicking his tongue over it. Keith’s hips jolted and Shiro leaned all the way in, settling his mouth around it and lapping in earnest. Keith let out a tremulous breath that hitched on a moan, hips shifting needily into Shiro’s mouth. The elder of the two pulled away to rub at the side of his jaw for a moment to ease the strain– his fingers picked up the slack, gently moving over the sensitive part before he replaced them with his tongue once again. Shiro’s entire mouth felt blissfully wet, everything in his mind running to a carnal blank as he leaned in and swiped his tongue over the sensitive opening between Keith’s legs. Keith’s moans began to grow needy and he rocked his hips up into the sensation.

                Shiro glanced up from between Keith’s legs, insides settling ablaze as they met one another’s stares. Keith looked absolutely wrecked, his hair fanned out around him on the furisode, one hand tangled in Shiro’s hair and the other desperately grasping at the fabric over his head. His eyes were almost completely out of focus, mouth wet and open and panting. Shiro surged against Keith’s body, pressing his tongue up inside of him.

                The tremor that ran down Keith’s spine was the most rewarding thing that Shiro could remember experiencing. Jaw burning, he withdrew his tongue and gently placed a fingertip against the entrance. He rubbed it in small circles, looking up at Keith and opening his mouth to ask permission.

                But before Shiro could speak, Keith shifted his hips and in a slick movement Shiro’s finger slid inside. Each parted their mouths, brows narrowing and eyes meeting before Keith rolled back his head and ground his hips against Shiro. Inside, it was burning hot, and every inch of Keith’s body squeezed and stroked Shiro’s finger as he slowly began to pump it in and out.

                “Does that feel good?” he asked, using his spare hand to cup Keith’s cheek. The younger stared at him through misted-over eyes and nodded enthusiastically.

                “Yeah,” Keith panted. “You can add another.”

                Shiro nodded and withdrew his finger, slowly pressing it back into Keith with a second.

                Keith produced a high pitched whine, cradling the back of Shiro’s hand in his palm, “You’re so gentle.”

                “I never want to hurt you,” Shiro replied, leaning in for another kiss. Hesitantly, he crooked his fingers and Keith’s hips shuttered over them.

                “Oh _fuck_ ,” he bit out. “Fuck – Shiro – _Takashi_ – _I want you inside._ ”

                At the sound of his first name, Shiro felt the very last remains of his self-restraint wither and die. He removed his fingers and immediately began to tug off the rest of his clothes, moaning when Keith replaced Shiro’s hand with his own, stroking over the folds and parting them with his fingers.

                “Fuck,” Shiro said softly, reaching out to stroke Keith with his fingers once more. “Are you sure you want me to—?”

                Keith scowled and wrapped his legs around Shiro’s waist, as if to make a point. Despite himself, Shiro laughed.

                “I get it,” he said, finally reaching down to take his own cock in hand. Shiro immediately moaned at the contact, not having realized how hard he’d gotten while he’d been tending to Keith. He slid forward, pressing the head of his cock up against Keith and hissing at the heat. Keith bucked his hips impatiently and Shiro gently held them down with his prosthetic. As carefully as he could, he pressed the head in. Keith’s mouth parted immediately, his breath held in his throat as his eyes pinched closed in absolute pleasure. Moaning appreciatively, Shiro released his hold on his cock and gently took Keith by the hips, fitting their bodies together. Slowly, Shiro rolled his hips to fit inside Keith the rest of the way, trembling at the heat and pressure that stroked him as he fit his hips flush against Keith’s.

                They stayed like that for a moment, Shiro shifting to rest his hands on either side of Keith’s head. Keith sat up, causing Shiro to shift around inside. He bit his lip, trying his hardest not to move his hips as Keith readjusted. The red paladin wrapped his arms around Shiro’s neck and kissed him hard and long. When he pulled away, Shiro asked: “How does it feel?”

                Keith moved up against Shiro, rolling his hips experimentally. “Good,” he responded huskily. “So _fucking_ good, Takashi.”

                “Good,” Shiro responded, leaning in for another kiss. Keith presented his mouth with no qualms and ground up against his boyfriend once more.

                “Takashi, _please_ ,” he begged, desperation creeping into his voice.

                He didn’t have to ask twice. Shiro withdrew himself a little and slowly pressed back into Keith. At the enthusiastic response, he repeated the motion, pulling out farther and allowing Keith’s body to stroke him from base to tip. Keith whined and writhed against him.

                “ _Faster,_ ” he begged. Shiro smiled and wrapped an arm around Keith, shifting up onto his knees to settle him on his lap. Keith’s body shuddered violently as he slid down the length of Shiro’s cock. For a moment Shiro thought that he’d hurt him, and grasped Keith’s shoulder in concern. But the red paladin’s eyes fluttered open and he grinned, grinding against Shiro shallowly.

                “This is _much_ better,” he panted, his next move Shiro in even deeper.

                “Yeah,” Shiro agreed breathlessly, for a better lack of anything to say. Keith set a quick pace, returning to their earlier urgency. Shiro placed one hand on Keith’s hip to steady him, the other stroking Keith’s cock. Moaning through the pleasure, Keith hissed impatiently and clicked his tongue, brow furrowing in frustration.

                “Are you okay?” Shiro asked, squeezing his hip comfortingly.

                “Yeah, I just – need you _deeper_ ,” Keith grit out, pulling off of Shiro and lying down on his back. “Come here?”

                Shiro complied immediately, helping to readjust Keith’s leg as he rested it on Shiro’s shoulder. Shiro slotted their hips together, using his hand to guide the head of his cock back into Keith before resting it on his boyfriend’s prone thigh.

                “Tell me if I hurt you, okay?” Shiro requested, eyes clouded in concern. Keith allowed him one of his rare, soft smiles, reaching up to brush the back of his hand over Shiro’s cheek.

                “You won’t,” he said with such sincerity and confidence that Shiro thought he might start crying. He slid back into Keith, who reached up to grip the fabric of the furisode with both hands, and then struggled to get his other leg up over Shiro’s left shoulder. Shiro pulled back a little and rested it there properly, thrusting all the way in.

                “ _God_ ,” Keith choked, abandoning the furisode and wrapping his arms around Shiro’s neck. At this point he was well and fully pinned, bent in half beneath Shiro, his trust absolute.

                He pulled back for another thrust, far less tentative than the last. Rolling himself in, the two set a steady tempo against one another, the tips of Keith’s fingers pressing bruises into Shiro’s back. Shiro continued to move, fueled on by the needy noises Keith produced. He could already feel the heat colleting in his gut, the tremors inside of Keith milking him as they moved. Keith’s nails raked down his back, his motions growing erratic as his body seized. Shiro bowed his head and thrust harder, each time connecting with something inside of Keith that made the other shout.

                “ _Takashi_ —,” Keith’s breath hitched on the last syllable, the strangled gasp evanescing into a silent scream as he arched himself against Shiro, the entirety of his body jerking and shaking. Shiro swore, burying his face into the crook of Keith’s neck, holding him as closely as he possibly could. All at once, the rippling pressure was too much and he felt the heat of orgasm overcome him. Existence whited out at the edges, Shiro’s mind becoming a pinprick of pleasure wrapped around Keith.

                Finally, the intensity ebbed and the tension in Shiro’s body snapped like a bowstring. Arms trembling with effort to keep himself from crushing Keith, he eased out of the other’s body, trembling when he felt the liquid rush of his own cum splatter over the sensitive head of his cock. He slid down Keith’s body, pressing his head into the other’s abdomen as he finally allowed himself to relax. Panting, he gazed up at Keith.

                Keith was struggling for breath, face aglow and eyes contently misted over. Taking a minute to catch his breath, Shiro pulled himself up to Keith’s side and rolled him onto his chest.

                They remained like that for a while, just breathing and slowly coming back down from the intensity of sex. Shiro mindlessly began to fiddle with Keith’s hair, the other bonelessly draped over him.

                “Are you asleep?” Shiro asked softly when Keith’s breathing had settled.

                “No,” the other replied, sliding up Shiro’s body to prop his head right below Shiro’s chin. Shiro kissed the top of Keith’s head, running his fingers down his cheek.

                “How do you feel?” he inquired.

                Keith laughed incredulously, “Fucking _amazing_.”

                Shiro snorted at his enthusiasm, “Good, me too.”

                Releasing a soft sigh, Keith kissed Shiro’s chest and attempted to sit up.

                “Nope,” he said, immediately flopping back down into Shiro’s arms. “My legs are jelly.”

                “You’ll sleep well tonight though, right?”

                “If I go to sleep, I don’t think I’ll ever wake up.”

                “I feel you,” Shiro grinned, cuddling up against his partner. Keith snuggled closer as well, still giving Shiro little kisses along his jaw. They laced their fingers together, just basking in one another’s presence.

                “I can’t believe we’re fake-married,” Keith said after a considerable silence.

                “I can’t believe I’ve been up for almost twenty hours,” Shiro said, glancing up at the inverted digital display of his dash. The time glowed down at him, making his eyes feel heavy.

                “I’m going to hate myself if I sleep on the floor,” Keith replied, finally managing to sit up. He began to grope around for his clothes. The lights of the cockpit began to glow dimly and Keith swore.

                “God damn it, I got cum all over this,” he mumbled, picking up the nagajuban and tossing it aside. “The other robes look okay, though.”

                “That’s good, just put those on,” Shiro yawned, pulling on his own kimono. “No one will notice: they’re probably all drunk by this point anyway.”

                Keith snorted, tying the kimono hastily in the back. He shrugged the furisode on and set the ridiculously long obi down beside the nagajuban. Shiro pulled on his haori and turn to Keith, smoothing down his hair. Keith returned the favor, using his fingers to comb Shiro’s into some semblance of its usual style. Linking hands, the two stared at one another for a moment before leaning in for a final kiss.

                “Let’s get back to that party, yeah?” Shiro asked, gesturing towards the exit. The Black Lion opened its mouth, allowing the pair to disembark.

                By two, one of the three pink moons has disappeared, and the others were small spheres in the sky. Holding hands and leaning against one another, Shiro and Keith advanced back into the woods before emerging into the town square.

                Everything seemed to have wound down at that point. Pidge was playing with one of the omnichords left behind by a band member, Hunk singing along sleepily. Coran was passed out face-first on the wedding party’s table, a half-empty cup in his hand. Allura was sitting next to him, nodding off as she attempted to listen to Florea’s drunken rambles. Lance’s legs were sticking out from under another table.

                “Hey,” Pidge slurred over Hunk’s song. “You missed your own party.”

                “I thought I told you not to drink?” Shiro accused her.

                “I’m sixteen and I’m gonna do whatever I want,” Pidge pointed at Shiro, taking her head. “You’re not my dad, he’s lost in space.”

                “I know Katie, and I’m very sorry,” Shiro said, approaching the young woman and helping her stand. Pidge wavered in place. Hunk was still singing, eyes half-closed. “Maybe you should go to your room and get some sleep.”

                “Yeah, I mean…” Pidge stumbled over Lance’s legs and a low groan was heard from beneath the table. “ _Fuck_ you Lance, go to bed.”

                “I’m dying from alcohol poisoning,” was the dramatically whispered response.

                “Lance you _shit_ ,” Pidge was saying. “You wimped out after one drink, you aren’t even drunk. You know who’s drunk. Katie Gunderson! I mean… Pitch Holt… Pidge…”

                One of the maids took Pidge by the arm and began to guide her towards one of the spires. Keith kicked one of Lance’s legs.

                “You’re not drunk, go to bed,” Keith informed him. Lance crawled out from under the table, yawning loudly.

                “Yeah okay,” he grumbled, grabbing Hunk’s shoulder as he walked by.

                “Wuzgoingon?” Hunk jumped awake.

                “The wedding’s over, it’s time for bed,” Lance informed him, sounding massively disappointed.

                “Oh,” Hunk stretched open him mouth into a tongue-curling yawn. “Okay. ‘Night everyone.”

                “Night,” Shiro waved the two off before turning to Allura and Coran. “Will he be okay?”

                “Oh,” said Allura sleepily. “Yes, he’ll be fine. I’ll have someone roll him into bed… eventually. Goodnight and congratulations, you two.”

                “Yes, congratulations,” Queen Florea slurred. “Ligustica… take them to the place… thing.”

                One of the handmaidens that was having a soft conversation nearby turned her attention to Shiro and Keith.

                “Right this way, please,” she said, holding her hand out towards one of the nearby buildings. They entered the narrow halls lined in little hexagonal windows and emptied out into a room with a plush mattress sitting on the floor. Before the maid even closed the door, Keith unceremoniously flung himself into the bed face first, furisode and all. Shiro laughed, removing the majority of his clothes until he was just wearing the dark kimono underneath. Keith struggled under the covers and – after a considerable amount of wiggling – the red robe seeped out from beneath them and settled onto the floor. Shiro slipped into the plush depths of the bed beside him, gathering Keith up into his arms. They kissed, settling into a comfortably familiar position of sleep.

                “I love you,” Shiro said sleepily.

                “I love you, too Shiro,” Keith responded, just as quietly.


End file.
